When I came to Christ and started to learn and gain understanding, wisdom and discernment, I received many rude awakenings.
I was so full of the desire to do whatever it took to be closer to the Lord. I would pray and say, “have Your way, Lord.” What I didn’t know was, I was giving God permission to break me. I was giving God authority to put me through things that I really didn’t know, understand or ever even thought about. You see, in order for God to have His way in me, I had to be broken (of self) and experienced (in His truth, His ways). Because our brokenness and experience is what He uses.
God allows us to endure certain things so that we can grow, be strengthened, to be broken of our (selfishness) flesh so that we may be used by God for His glory. When you ask God to use you, when you ask Him to draw nearer to us, we must be mindful of what that could look like, it’s not always the same. And it’s not always out of joy and convenience that we draw near to Him and are used by Him. Sometimes it’s out of total disparity we draw near. Sometimes it’s in absolutely pain when He uses us. Don’t be discouraged by this, just fall into the arms of the Lord. It’s all for the glory of the Lord. Nothing is wasted.
“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. Moreover whom He predestined, these He also called; whom He called, these He also justified; and whom He justified, these He also glorified.”
Romans 8:18, 28-30 NKJV
2 Corinthians 12:9-10